its 7 am and I’m in the office on a saturday morning while everyone is
uploading pics and updates from PAX, Dragcon Con and Cosplay America……
oh yeah, SacAnime too but lol who cares about that lolololjk.
Been loosing more and more sleep lately. Been rather anxious and yesterday
the hammer came down hard.
Yesterday marked the official 2nd wk of school thus following I finally got
a full look at how the workload will be playing out through the rest of the
semester and it is quite overwhelming. I feel I never prepared myself for
this and now I’m bracing for impact.
I clearly have terrible time management skills and as always I do not
foresee this improving anytime soon or at all as this has been a routine in
the last two decades of my life. So what makes me thnk this wil change
anytime soon. I am after all a creature of habbit.
theres just never enough time, never enough energy and sometimes when I am
laxed or in leisure I feel the anxiety building up that I should be taking
that time to consistently come up with ways to make a buck or two. But in
the end, is it realy worth the effort the little buck your gonna earn? I
like to think it might turn into a long term investment in the long run,
you’ll never know until you try but I’m also the type to be a working mule
and have consistently mulled over the possibility of taking on a 2nd job
ontop of my workload for school, I personally think if it was up to me
ultimately I will find the energy to keep up. Its simply a matter of how to
work this into a sufficient and effective work schedule /: I dont think its
entirely impossible, its just a matter of someone willing to hire me to
work less than 20 hrs a week for a 2nd job heh….
or I can nut up and keep taking on commissions as well but does it really
weight out in the end coz I always feel I’m on the loosing end on those….
too much time and budget goes into the costume itself and I profit little
to nothing..and the stress and anxiety of super picky customers
A resonating lesson I hear from countless individuals is ‘never give up
your education’ and its quite true but its also rather stressing how you
feel the need to make the buck now and come back to this later…and its
gonna continue to be pushed back further and further. Were not making
progress. Were taking 1 step forward and 3 steps back.
This has been a consistent revolving door for me….
makes me wanna vomit.